Holding it in my hand

I am holding a "global referral" for fertility treatment in my hand. I almost don't believe it. I've become so distrustful and scared and anxious in this process, that I can scarcely trust it. I keep telling myself to breathe deep and believe it. I got a referral. I will get treatment. Some of it will be paid for .... So far, it's not sinking in. Because, of course, there is yet another hitch. Because the Nothing Is Ever Easy principle always applies. The doctor that I wanted (the latest in the line of doctors that I wanted) has left his practice. Yup, in the last two weeks, since I got the non-referral referral. And this new, honest-to-god, real referral has his name on it. And you have to go to the specific doc on the form. So I'll have to get them to re-do it with a new(est) choice. I've lost count of how many doctors I've tried to see at this point. But even my totally scared self thinks that this is just be an administrative hurdle. Right? They've already given me the referral, they just have to re-write it with a new name. I think after thousands and thousands of out-of-pocket dollars, I'm about to have insurance coverage. I'm scared and still a bit doubtful, but coming around to grateful and relieved.