Two Frown-ey Faces

1st Frown - I got a mean comment on my blog! Somehow (dumb me!) I didn't know to expect that. If it hadn't stung (but it did indeed sting - ouch!), it almost would have been funny. The anonymous meanie said that my post was "self-indulgent" and "insecure." Self-indulgent? No, really? Taking up space in the blogosphere to talk about myself is self-indulgent? Um. Duh. I thought that was part of the definition of a blog. I mean, hell, I'm not even spouting off deep thoughts, or providing commentary and analysis on current events or things of import to the wider world. I've created a blog to talk about my body temperature, the texture of my freakin' cervical mucus, my own personal deepest desires, and even what my period feels like. Self-indulgent was sort of the point. And the meanie comment person asked if I "feel much insecurity?" Hah! Much? How about more than much? How about a whole hell of a lot of the time? Again, I thought that was self-evident. And kind of the point. If being a 36-year old lesbian who is trying to get in touch with her reproductive system, buy sperm, and make a baby doesn't make one insecure (and anxious, fearful, and a tad obsessive), then I don't know what would. I started this blog to have a space to dump out all my insecurities and then hopefully work through them. So, little meanie commenter, your note wasn't helpful or revelatory. It was obvious and mean. And that makes me feel sorry for you. Because I might be self-indulgent, insecure, anxious, scared, jealous, vulnerable, occasionally depressed or even petty .... but I'm not mean. I did not use any part of my time today to proactively go out of my way to be hurtful to someone. And you did. I'm so sorry that you felt the need to do that. The only possible response I can have, since it was this post that set you off, is to picture you as a child. (Seems fair, and does serve you right.) So I'm sitting here, right now, thinking of what you might have been like as a child before life's setbacks and painful moments turned you into an insecure person who found it necessary to leave hurtful comments on someone's blog. I'm sending love to that little kid now ... and getting over being stung by you. Seems like the best thing I can do. (Well, that and no longer accepting anonymous comments on my blog.) Hope you have a better day tomorrow, Anonymous Meanie.

2nd Frown - Well, 2nd frown isn't really a frown, just the absence of a smile. I usually get a smiling +OPK on the morning of CD15 or CD16. This is the afternoon of CD16 and now smile yet. So, I wait.